


tell me that it wasn't black and white

by gannonic



Category: Descendants (2015), The Isle of the Lost Series - Melissa de la Cruz
Genre: Child Abuse, Fucked Up, Gen, also its probably all over the place im not a real writer im sorry, carlos is, deals w heavy themes, mostly reflects on cruella bc shes what fucked him up, this is so carlos centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-28
Updated: 2017-07-28
Packaged: 2018-12-08 04:26:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11638878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gannonic/pseuds/gannonic
Summary: you don't miss her, or love her, but you're glad she was your mother.





	tell me that it wasn't black and white

**Author's Note:**

> can i get a fucking uhhhhhhh
> 
> carlos centricism plus slight character analyzation and a lot of inaccuracies can i get an amen
> 
> [my tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/chadlos)

it was different to everyone you knew. your family (the ones from the isle, the ones who knew you, who could only just begin to understand) saw the surface of you and didnt bother or try to see more. they saw what they saw and that was enough, without listening to you, because of course nobody would think to do that. 

they saw the bruises and cuts and there was always a "we'll take care of it, carlos, you're staying in the treehouse tonight, carlos," and then the babying and protecting and you'd do anything for them, you would, but.

but you've also gone head to head with the worst of your bullies. you've punched back and you've bitten and scratched and you're the reason harriet hook wears that eyepatch, you and your knife you always carry on you. you know you'll never be the scary one, not even close, but goddamn you can take care of yourself.

your mother knew that. you can't remember her ever babying you, just the rarest tender moments were she would wrap you up in her fur and stroke your hair and hum, but she never did anything to help you and sometimes you wonder how you survived infancy.

as you got older, her lucid moments got less frequent and warm furs were traded for screaming and hard grounds to sleep on and slaps, but that was fine because you were older and didn't need her taking care of you anyways. 

your friends (the ones in auradon, the ones who pity you, who could never understand) saw that as a problem. mothers here were supposed to coddle their children and give them hugs and kisses and provide for them until they were so soft they could melt.

you've mentioned to ben that auradon should fix it's parenting, and he asked what you meant, and he looked so horrified when you explained it was all "no, carlos, you should get help, carlos," and then he was talking about therapists and you checked out. you love ben, he's great, but.

but he would never understand where you're coming from. none of them would, because they've sat on their asses their whole life, complaining about the most mundane things and never having to work for anything. anything you wanted you had to fight for, you fought for every last inch that you got, and goddamn the once thing you fear isn't your mother, it's incompetence, because inconpetence makes you useless and if you're useless you're dead.

your mother knew that. she made you do chores and errands on top of school and your inventions and inside you feel like you're always too overwhelmed, too overworked, but you can fully function for 48 hours without sleep and you're brain is always sharp and going and you're the smartest in your grade (in the school) and you always have been.

you don't have chores anymore, you've found hobbies beyond inventing or fixing, but your friend, none of them can understand your drive, your need to please people so they'll keep you around. 

jay does, though. you know his father is the same way, if jay couldn't bring home his daily haul, he wasn't allowed in and he had to sleep elsewhere (your treehouse) before starting the cycle tomorrow. and evie. youu know her mother wouldn't let her go outside if she had one stroke of makeup off, told her she'd never be loved and that she wasn't the most beautiful girl you've ever seen (she was). and mal. her mother was always so hard on her, forcing her to be an exact copy of everything maleficent strived to be, never caring about anything she did as long as she said it was bad (sometimes it wasnt).

none of you hated auradon, but through quiet midnight sleepovers and lazy weekend hangouts, it was mutually agreed you were all fine with having missed the cozy, sheltered childhood. evie says something about how you wouldn't have been who you are now if that's how it had been, and it makes you frown.

who are you now? you're an edgy teen who's kind of given up caring, but somehow you still care too much. you have a family and friends and nightmares and dreams and. and you're proud of eho you are. 

you don't miss her, or love her, but you're glad she was your mother.


End file.
